What do these four items have in common?
They have all made their way into Mini’s mouth recently and had to be quickly removed before any damage was done! Mini loves crap and by crap I mean the many, many tiny and not so tiny items that one finds on an ordinary living room floor on a daily basis. The tiniest little crumb of half chewed rice cake she will seek out and lock tractor beam on, to be transported hungrily into her gob. If chewing unsuitable foreign objects was an Olympic event, then it’d be a case of move over Katie Taylor, Ireland’s got a new bankable gold medal winner in the form of Mini.
Mini is never left on her own but it only takes a second for her to complete the reach out, grab, place in mouth axis of evil actions. Thankfully, she’s not quick to swallow objects, instead preferring to chew and go into what we term ‘hamster mode’; that is store the items in her eminently pinchable, round cheeks. For this I am eternally grateful, as truth be told, I’m not the most observant of people. I live in fear of the day I am mugged-not so much for the traumatic experience at the hands of another, but for the questioning there after when the garda tries to garner a description of the perpetrator based on my observation.
“Yes, um, I believe it was a man who robbed me, Garda and I…yes…I’m fairly sure he had a head.. Hair colour? Ummmm, blondy-beigy-browny-ginger-black….Eyes?Two..I think…” You get the picture!
So I’m very glad of this delaying tactic Mini has employed because until she starts to walk, she’s very much at near eye level to all of this wondrous crap that’s there to explore orally. She still doesn’t have any teeth so these items are a way of massaging her rock hard gums. Until the tottering steps and tiny teeth come, and I really don’t think we have too much longer to wait for either, I’ll have to try and reprogramme a life time of unobservant nonchalance-its just one more lesson that parenthood has to teach me. It has also spurred me on to enrol in a first aid course as God forbid, the day Mini decides the hamster cheeks method just doesn’t cut it anymore and tries to see the effect a curtain hook would have on her oesophagus..*shudder!
In the meantime, my mother is full of compliments about how clean the house is-a side effect of trying to ensure Mini has as few items as possible to pop in her mouth is the copious amounts of hoovering I’m currently engaged in. But you’re not to know this Mum, that’s just me nailing the domestic goddess part!Ahem…