Looking at my two amazing kids, the thought occurs to me-I would love to meet more!It’s such an exciting thought-what would they look like?Would we finally make a baby who shares our eye colour? (Green-hazel.) What would that little one be like? I’ll never forget the first time I met both of my girls. The difference in them was apparent and immense from just a few seconds old. Mini arrived into this world with a look of serenity and calm curiousity on her elfin features. It was like
“Here I am, pleased to meet you, now what more is there to be seen?”
Mini Mini was less impressed with the whole birth show. She came out looking mad as hell, with her it was more like-
“What the fuck just happened?”
“Who the fuck are all you people?”
“What the fuck am I doing here?”
Those personalities are now being well cemented-Mini is a happy, curiosity box. Mini Mini is a diva! I often wonder what no 3 would be like but then a whole host of reasons not to go again pop into my mind, giving me a moment’s pause. Labour isn’t amongst those reasons. Yes it hurt like hell but the pain was (mercifully!) brief and the reward more than made up for it. No, it’s more the following reasons that have been playing on my mind, making me believe it may be time to retire the uterus for good.
1. The Numbers Game
I like the balance of two kids and two adults. The Frenchman works most evenings and I’m already outnumbered two to one, no need to make it three to one! Plus there’s something I really like about the phrase “family of four”.
2. “That’s not my name”
I get the Minis’ names mixed up all the time. And these are two names which are nothing alike!One has two syllables, the other three. One is French, the other Irish. One starts with a vowel, the other with a consonent. And still I mix them up on a near daily basis!This does not bode well for any future sprogs.
3. The XX Factor
I personally wouldn’t mind whether or not a little blue entered our lives as long as baba is healthy, that’s the important thing. Those first few days of Mini’s life before her wee heart got the all clear were terrifying. So I can honestly say I wouldn’t mind having a boy or another girl and I know deep down the Frenchman feels the same. He comes from a family that has an abundance of females, however, and sometimes during family visits, I can see his eyes glaze over and wishfully glance at the garden shed where he has all sorts of glorious escape plans for. I tell him it is his destiny to be surrounded by fabulous women but secretly I fear that having three daughters may just strip him of his last remaining ounce of sanity. Two words-synchronised periods.
4. The Transport Conundrum
We upgraded our reliable but tiny Renault Clio to a family friendly Ford Focus, which I love just as much as our old “Ruby”. The Focus allows us to fit two baby seats into the back without having our knees pressed up against our ears while driving but there definitely would not be room for a third infant or toddler seat!
5. That Former Life
There’s something calming in the thought that my childbearing days are behind me I was an emotional wreck during both of my pregnancies, constantly fearing the worst and was more anxious than at any other time of my life. And then, once they’re born, there’s this overwhelming rush of love that’s tinged with fear. What if something happens them?How would I cope?I read a beautiful saying somewhere recently-once you become a parent you have to take extra care of your heart because from now on it resides outside of you. Too right it does!I’m a nervous wreck some days. The day Mini went tumbling down the stairs, the day Mini-Mini nearly choked on a piece of rusk. Add another child to the mix and I may just be too consumed with anxiety to even get up in the mornings!
6. Where’s my beauty sleep?
Perhaps the biggest stumbling block to pregnancy no 3 is the lack of sleep. I have decided that I can live with many things including spinal shits, 3 am projectile vomits, crappy jobs that must be held onto in order to put food on the table but the one thing I cannot seem to get to grips with is the lack of sleep. I can see now how sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture in some parts of the world. There are days when I feel like I’m losing my mind!Mini-Mini continues to lead us on a not so merry nocturnal dance that sees us grabbing a few hours kip here and there but it’s just not enough. Having to go through all this again strikes fear into my heart!
But then I look at these little faces and all reasoning and logic goes out the window!Cute babies-keeping the human race going since the dawn of time!